Music

Kimbra – Two Way Street

 

 

I feel the four become five
And I’m waiting, waiting, waiting
For you to walk down the boulevard
And to take me, take me, take me

But the moment you appear
You wake me, wake me, wake me
Out of the slumbers of my head
From the slums of loneliness

[Hook]
And there’s no conspiracy
Behind the way two hearts meet
When love is a two way street (Love is a two way street)
And I think I’m ready
To let you get under my skin
I can’t make you fall for me (Love is a two way street)

We’re coming close to our fame
They’ll put a star beside our names
But I couldn’t care for the history
When I’ve got you in front of me

And the cars could all collide
The shards of glass
 won’t catch my eye
Because you’re almost by my side
We’re counting down at the green light

[Hook]

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Music

Ariana Grande ft. Macy Gray – Leave Me Lonely

 

 

[Refrain: Macy Gray]
Dangerous love
You’re no good for me, darling
Yeah, you turn me away
Like I’m begging for a dollar
Danger, oh, how you hold me
I get a chill inside
And nothing frightens me, baby, oh

[Verse 1: Ariana Grande]
Is it love when so easily you said goodbye?
Is it love when we’ve given up before we tried?
Is it love when you stole my peace of mind?
Is it love when you cry, and cry and cry?

[Pre-Chorus: Ariana Grande]
So when you walk out that door
Don’t you come back no more
My heart has had enough of the give and take
And as much as I want you to stay

[Chorus 1: Ariana Grande]
You’re a dangerous love
Maybe you’re no good for me, darling
Cause if you’re gonna love me and leave me hanging here
Then I’d rather you leave me lonely
Even though it hurts
Ooh, you’re a dangerous love, oh

[Refrain: Macy Gray]
Dangerous love
You’re no good for me, darling
Yeah, you turn me away
Like I’m begging for a dollar
Danger, oh, how you hold me
I get a chill inside
And nothing frightens me, baby, oh

[Pre-Chorus: Ariana Grande]
So when you walk out that door
Don’t you come back no more
My heart has had enough of the give and take
And as much as I want you to stay

[Chorus 2: Ariana Grande]
You’re a dangerous love
Maybe you’re no good for me, darling
Cause if you’re gonna love me and leave me hanging here
Then I’d rather you leave, leave me lonely
Even though it hurts
You’re a dangerous love, baby

[Refrain: Macy Gray]
Dangerous love
You’re no good for me, darling
Yeah, you turn me away
Like I’m begging for a dollar
Danger, oh, how you hold me
I get a chill inside
And nothing frightens me, baby, oh

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Music

Destiny’s Child – Emotion

 

 

 

Verse 1 [Kelly]:
Its over and done
But the heart ache lives on inside
And who is the one you’re clinging to
Instead of me tonight

Hook [Destiny’s Child]:
And where are you now
Now that I need you
Tears on my pillow
Where ever you go, go
Cry me a river
That leads to your ocean
You’ll never see me fall apart

Chorus [Destiny’s Child]:
In the words of a broken heart its just emotions taking me over
Caught up in sorrow
Lost in the song
But if you don’t come back
Come home to me darlin’
Don’t you know there’s no (no body left in this world to hold me tight)
And don’t you know there’s no (nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight)
Kiss goodnight
(Goodnight, goodnight)

Verse 2 [Beyonce]:
I’m there at your side
Apart of all the things you are
But you gotta find some one else
You gotta go find your shinning star

Hook [Destiny’s Child]:
And where are you now
Now that I need you
Tears on my pillow
Where ever you go, go
Cry me a river
That leads to your ocean
You’ll never see me all apart

Chorus [Destiny’s Child]:
In the words of a broken heart its just emotions taking me over
Caught up in sorrow
Lost in the song
But if you don’t come back
Come home to me darlin’
Don’t you know there’s no (no body left in this world to hold me tight)
And don’t you know there’s no (nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight)
Kiss goodnight
(Goodnight, goodnight)

Hook [Destiny’s Child]:
And where are you now
Now that I need you
Tears on my pillow
Where ever you go, go
Cry me a river
That leads to your ocean
You’ll never see me all apart

Chorus [Destiny’s Child]:
In the words of a broken heart its just emotions taking me over
Caught up in sorrow
Lost in the song
But if you don’t come back
Come home to me darlin’
Don’t you know there’s no (no body left in this world to hold me tight)
And don’t you know there’s no (nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight)
Kiss goodnight
(Goodnight, goodnight)

 

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Music

Destiny’s Child – Girl

 

[Verse 1: Beyoncé]
Take a minute girl, come sit down
And tell us what’s been happening
In your face I can see the pain
Don’t you try to convince us that you’re happy, yeah
We’ve seen this all before
Brothers taking advantage of the passion
Because we’ve come too far for you to feel alone
You don’t let him walk over your heart, I’m telling you

[Hook]
Girl, I can tell you’ve been crying
And you needing somebody to talk to
Girl, I can tell he’s been lying
And pretending that he’s faithful and he loves you
Girl, you don’t have to be hiding
Don’t you be ashamed to say he hurt you
I’m your girl, you’re my girl, we your girls
We want you to know that we love you

[Verse 2: Kelly]
See, what y’all don’t know about him
Is I can’t let him go because he needs me
It ain’t really him, it’s stress from his job
And I ain’t making it easy
I know you see him bugging most of the time
But I know deep inside, he don’t mean it
It gets hard sometimes but I need my man
I don’t think y’all understand, I’m telling ya

[Hook]
Girl, I can tell you’ve been crying
And you needing somebody to talk to
Girl, I can tell he’s been lying
And pretending that he’s faithful and he loves you
Girl, you don’t have to be hiding
Don’t you be ashamed to say he hurt you
I’m your girl, you’re my girl, we your girls
We want you to know that we love you
Girl, I can tell you’ve been crying
And you needing somebody to talk to
Girl, I can tell he’s been lying
And pretending that he’s faithful and he loves you
Girl, you don’t have to be hiding
Don’t you be ashamed to say he hurt you
I’m your girl, you’re my girl, we your girls
We want you to know that we love you

[Bridge: Michelle]
Girl, take a good look at yourself
He got you going through hell
We ain’t never seen ya down like this
What you mean you don’t need us to help?
We know each other too well
Girl, you’re my girl, we your girls
We want you to know that we love you

[Hook]
Girl, I can tell you’ve been crying
And you needing somebody to talk to
Girl, I can tell he’s been lying
And pretending that he’s faithful and he loves you
Girl, you don’t have to be hiding
Don’t you be ashamed to say he hurt you
I’m your girl, you’re my girl, we your girls
We want you to know that we love you
Girl, I can tell you’ve been crying
And you needing somebody to talk to
Girl, I can tell he’s been lying
And pretending that he’s faithful and he loves you
Girl, you don’t have to be hiding
Don’t you be ashamed to say he hurt you
I’m your girl, you’re my girl, we your girls
We want you to know that we love you

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Music

SZA ft. Travi$ Scott – Love Galore

 

 

[Intro: Travis Scott]
I need, I need
I need, I need
I need, I need
I need, I need
I need, I need

[Hook: SZA]
Love, love, love, love
‘long as we got
Love, love, love
‘long as we got

[Verse 1: SZA]
Done with these niggas
I don’t love these niggas
I dust off these niggas
Do it for fun
Don’t take it personal
Personally, I’m surprised you
Called me after the things I said
Skrrt, skrrt on niggas
Skirt up on niggas
Skirt down, you acting like me
Acting like we
Wasn’t more than a summer fling
I said farewell
You took it well
Promise I won’t cry over spilled milk
(Ooh no, I won’t)
Gimme a paper towel
Gimme another valium
Gimme another hour or two
Hour with you

[Pre-Hook: SZA & Travis Scott]
Why you bother me when you know you don’t want me?
Why you bother me when you know you got a woman?
Why you hit me when you know you know better?
Know you know better
Know your crew better than you do
Call me looking for ya (yeah)
I be looking for ya (yeah)
Got me looking forward to weekends
With you baby
With you baby
With you baby
With you

We do whatever we want
Go wherever we want
Love however we want
It don’t matter
You’ll do whatever I want
Get whatever I want
Get whatever I need
It’s about

[Hook: SZA]
Love, love, love, love
‘long as we got
Love, love, love
‘long as we got

[Verse 2: SZA]
Should’ve never gave you my number
I did it with you
Should’ve never let you hit it
I split it with you
I regret it
You gots a fetish
You gots a problem
Now it’s a problem, oh no
Skrrt, skrrt on bitches
I don’t know these bitches
Dig dirt on bitches
Do it for fun
Don’t take it personal baby
I love ’em all lately
Luh-love to my ladies
I dated a few

[Verse 3: Travis Scott]
Why you bother me?
Why you bother me?
Why you bother me?
Last time I checked you were the one that left
Me in a wreck, me in a mess
You all I rep, like my side I rep
That’s that Mo city
That side that you can’t come ’round at night, yeah
You like to get me high
You don’t want no one beside ya
You like when I make fire
You say La Flame can make you fly, yeah (make you fly, yeah)
Let me cum inside ya
Let me plant that seed inside, yeah
Ass and titties, titties
The only thing that stuck with me, with me
Only thing that was real
Only thing I could feel, you feel me? (feel me)
So why you bother me, why you bother me?
Tryna catch a P.O.V (tryna catch a P.O.V, nah)

[Hook: SZA]
Love, love, love, love
‘long as we got
Love, love, love
‘long as we got

[Outro: SZA]
Huooh, I came to your city
Lookin’ for lovin’ n licky
‘Cause you promised to put it down
All up in your city, lookin’ for you oh
Searchin’ for your light, oh
Only thing keeping me from jumpin’ you right now
Right now, love
Only thing keepin’ me by your side
Only thing keepin’ me by your side now

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thoughts

Me vs. Myself vs. I

The victor: my anxiety
The reigning champion: my depression

I would have never thought to see the day where I let my anxiety get to me. I’m stronger than this – I fucking KNOW I am… But here I am, succumbing to the depths of my own [negative] thoughts, allowing myself to be consumed by the backlogs of my memory, being absorbed by the white noise of whatever is going on in my mind.

It’s hard to explain to someone, really. That’s why I don’t talk much. Also because I know the catalyst of my situation and I don’t want to be judged for it. But it’s whatever – it’s always whatever.

Don’t get me wrong, though. I am more than grateful for the individuals in my life that have reached out and uplifted my mindset. I am more than grateful for the individuals in my life that always radiate love into our conversations, joy, happiness, laughter. Words cannot express how thankful I am for the handful that have kept my spirits up.

But I am so exhausted of living like I am full when really, I feel nothing. I’m numb again. My happiness can only last for so long and I cry every time because I’ve missed such a feeling. I’m really tired of this constant up and down of emotions, the continual fluctuation of feeling up and ready versus down and out. But more times I just don’t feel like doing anything.

It has reached the point where I feel the need to be intoxicated to hit the tip of the iceberg that is my so-called happiness. Lol shit makes me sad just thinking about it as I typed it…

You win, anxiety. You beat me again, depression.

I’m off it.

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